art is truth. (a poem on existential themes)

art is truth.

art is truth.

art is truth.

art is truth.

art is truth.

!

The Histories

When America was started in 1492, Indians were around. They made many nice handicrafts and vegetables that they traded with Pilgrims. This is my thesis. The Pilgrims were very happy to have such nice things that the Indians gave them. Pilgrims like to wear black clothes with big buckles on them. Indian like to wear beads and feathers and animal-hides. But when they trade, everything gets mixed up!

In england, the Pilgrims didn't get to practice their religion because of the King. They came to America for Freedom. When they sailed over to America on the Mayflower, they found out that the Indians had been waiting for them! Then they had Thanksgiving. 

At Thanksgiving, my family has turkey and cornbread stuffing and mashed potatoes and gravy and green beans and pumpkin pie with whipped cream. We go to Aunt Shelly's house most years but last year she and Uncle Billy had a baby from China. So we had Thanksgiving at our house.

The Indians and the Pilgrims had a nice Thanksgiving too. They had corn and turkey and pumpkin pie but no whipped cream. What did they talk about? They talked about how hard the journey was to the New World and how happy they all were to be together. They also talked about freedom and liberty and the Constitution. The Mayflower compact helped the Pilgrims to start their own country.

Then, they wrote the Declaration of Independence form England. George Washington was President and thomas Jefferson was his friend. Then they won the Revolution and Betsy Ross made a flag for us. (With only 13 stars for the thirteen original colonies).

But then, slavery was not fair because African Americans did not get to be equal and to have their freedom. But Abraham Lincoln decided enough was enough. Abraham Lincoln was born in a log cabin and then was President. The Civil War was hard and sad, but they won when Abraham  Lincoln got shot.

After the Civil War, everything was better. A lot of people came on Ellis Island and America is a melting pot. But then, Hitler came and he was a Nazi and he didn't like Jewish people. My friend David is Jewish, and one time I went to his house for Passover, and it was fun. My granddad went in World War Two and fought the Nazis and won. After that, Franklin Roosevelt.

Martin Luther King is the next thing in American History. Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks, helped black people be equal again. And then, he got shot, and everyone was so sad, but it was ok because black people had Civil Rights.

September 11 changed everything. I was 4. My dad was in Orlando for his work and had to drive all the way home to our house. Terrorists came on September 11 because they hate freedom. They want us all to be the same.

This year, is the election, and it is very important to us. Pilgrims would want us to vote. It's what they wanted all along. 

A Dream

A contact of ours recounted the following dream to us...

He found himself standing on a lawn outside a house filled with people partying. He entered the house, and everyone suddenly went quiet and stared at him. There was an awkward silence, maybe ten to twenty seconds. Then, one girl came forward and said to him, in a tone as cold as ice:

"You raped EVERYONE!"

He then woke up.

How to become fabulously wealthy at the playful expense of others

1) Selling oranges:

Start by stealing oranges, as many as you can. Sell them to at $1 per orange to Barnard girls, also the elderly. 14 oranges at $1 per orange = $14 = the cost of a dining hall meal - steal more than this after each swipe and you'll be in pure profit. 

As a bonus, oranges with pink ribbons can be sold at a "special price" of $3 as "Breast Cancer Oranges." The term "Breast Cancer Oranges" is highly vague, is up to anyone's interpretation, and does not directly imply donations to any sort of breast cancer related organization. 

2) Investment of orange theft related windfall profits:

 *N.B. American and Canadian quarters both work in laundry machines in America, presumably the same applies in Canada. Furthermore, recent changes in the economy have decreased the value of the American quarter to below that of the Canadian quarter. 

Thus, withdraw all orange profit money from checking account in American quarters (this should be at least $10000US). Hitchhike to Montreal. Seek out connections to the notorious Canadian underground black market laundry service industry (*hint: look for a man with an eyepatch and a scar on his left cheek named Édouard). Use American quarters in Canadian laundry machines to reduce costs to below what your competitors could afford. Establish yourself as a prominent, ruthless, bloodthirsty, and influential figure on the scene. Eliminate all competition - soon, you'll be running the biggest underground laundry service in the eastern provinces. Watch your back. Cash flow should be upwards of $200,000CN per week. As an added incentive for customers, include a complimentary (stolen) orange with orders of more than 20lbs. Also, as another added incentive, make an example of any customer who tries to go legit.

3) Return to the United States two years later with profits which should exceed $20,000,000CN. Given the failing American economy, retain profits in Canadian currency until such time as they can be converted into gold.